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Category: Family Support

Stress And Anxiety In Handling An Unhealthy Family Relationship

July 20, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

Sometimes, it is not easy to become part of an unhealthy relationship within the family. There are these moments that can make you feel mentally and emotionally unstable. There are these times when you have to ensure and prove to yourself that you will give your best no matter what. And that means you are not allowed to fail, especially when everyone is counting on you. But what if your coping mechanisms are more damaging than helpful? What if your way of caring for yourself can cause extreme damage to other people’s emotional and mental states? Would you rather put yourself and your family’s overall health at stake only to get away with your stress and anxiety? Let’s talk about that.


Unhealthy Relationship

An unhealthy family relationship has something to do with being in a state of stress and anxiety. Sometimes, you get so fed up with your family that you somehow wish you are not part of them. Sometimes you fail to convince yourself that it is okay since that is family. As a result, you make decisions that are not entirely helpful for you and your family relationship. Some of these are the following:

You Always Keep Yourself Busy So You Won’t Have To Spend Time With Your Family

It is like telling yourself that the more you work on other stuff, the more you can avoid dealing with your family’s stressful issues. It is an action that puts you in a safe position at some point. However, its drawbacks when you and your family start to experience the gap of the relationship. Sooner or later, you will come to an end where you can’t find enough reason to care for them anymore, one where even a meaningful conversation won’t change a thing.


You Isolate Yourself So You Will Not Have To Deal With Your Dysfunctional Family

It could be a great excuse to isolate yourself from the people around you who you thought can be toxic. It gives you time to think about everything that has been going on with your life and relationship. However, isolation is dangerous because it tends to stay permanent. There is a possibility that when you are emotionally and mentally unstable, you will get stuck on it.

You Do Not Trust Any Members Of Your Family Because You Think They Do The Same

An unhealthy relationship between family members often starts when someone doubts. You put a blame card onto someone so she or he can become accountable for negative things that are happening around you. You believe that it is okay to do that because your family also thinks of you that way. There is this mentality that because they do not trust you, you should not trust them either. As a result, you grow apart from each other. Over time, it gets worst as you tend to ignore them.


You Talk Bad Things About Your Family Behind Their Back

Because you want to keep your sanity, there are moments when you encourage yourself that your family relationship has nothing to do with you. In some cases, you put all the blame on them to keep a clean slate. But to convince others, you need to come up with something that other people will agree with you. That is when you begin to talk about bad things about your family behind their back. Unfortunately, it is common for some individuals who suffer from toxic family’s stress and anxiety.

You Never Reach Out To Your Family Even If You Had The Chance

One of the worst things that can describe an unhealthy family is a lack of communication. However, it contains a lot of factors before one can consider it a cause. Sometimes, due to all the unwanted stress and anxiety, you would instead choose not to reach out to family members. You somehow feel that things will never change even if you exert an effort to fix things between you and your family.


You Cut Ties With Your Family Permanently Without Explaining Your Reasons

When dealing with a stressful family, you get used to the advice of throwing them out of your life. Perhaps in some instances, you find it simple and easy to do. However, it is not fair that you leave your family out of your life just because they cause you stress and anxiety. Yes, there will be bad times in the relationship, and that is normal. But if you choose to let go of them just because you feel like it, then you are unreasonable. If you entirely want to execute that decision, ensure that you provide a valid reason.

Remember, every individual deals with their family stress differently. These may work to some, but it does not guarantee to be useful for others. So when dealing with your family, always remember to be considerate, compassionate, and understanding all the time.


Categories: Family Support

Depression, Anxiety, And Other Emotional Health Issues Of Teens In Quarantine

June 10, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

Humans are inherently social beings. And the coronavirus pandemic has made it harder for us to fulfill our social needs. Because we need to stay at home to keep ourselves physically healthy, we have pulled away from our friends and loved ones. This quarantine and the uncertainty have taken a toll on our teens’ emotional health, affecting how they act and behave at home. 

Watch out for these emotional health issues that your teen may be facing in quarantine.



News about the global effects of the coronavirus pandemic has been plaguing both the internet and the television. Because our teens have access to this information, it can make them overstressed and depressed. Signs of depression include:

  • low mood
  • sleep issues – oversleeping or insomnia
  • lack of interest in doing things that they usually enjoy
  • sudden increase or decrease in weight
  • restlessness

Teenage depression may also lead to suicide ideation. Contrary to the idea that talking about suicide influences your teen to do it, it would be best to speak to them about how they feel when you notice these symptoms.

Katherine Nguyen Williams, Ph.D., further shares, “Studies after studies have shown that asking about suicide does not increase the risk of suicide. Rather, asking about suicide can decrease the risk and potentially saves lives.”


Teens tend to feel emotions more intensely than adults and children. It happens due to the hormonal and physical changes, among others, that their body is going through in puberty. If you, as the parents, feel anxious because of the pandemic, your teen is feeling worse. Symptoms of an anxiety disorder include:

  • nervousness or restlessness
  • panic
  • trouble concentrating
  • gastrointestinal problems
  • cold sweat
  • hyperventilation

Feeling anxiety is normal, especially in these stressful times. When you notice these signs in your teens, talk to them about it, and offer reassurance. Limiting screen time and finding other activities to focus on can also help them.

Social Isolation


There is an implementation of quarantine guidelines that aim to keep us physically safe and healthy, but it may also fuel your teen’s loneliness. Because they are out of their usual routine of seeing friends, they may start to withdraw from the family. Social isolation is cutting off contact with other people due to loss of mobility, depression, and other health issues.

It is important to note that social isolation can make your teens lonelier. When you notice that they are withdrawing from family time or locking themselves in their rooms, you may need to talk to them about it. You may also ask them to unplug from social media and encourage them to exercise more often.

Emotional Exhaustion

Constantly feeling no control over life can make your teens emotionally exhausted. Before this pandemic, when teens feel overstressed, they can go out and have fun with their friends. Now that they cannot do this, they are more susceptible to feeling emotionally drained. It may result in insomnia, anxiety, and depression.

When you notice that your teen is unmotivated, absent-minded, having trouble sleeping, and overfatigued, you must help them deal with it. Eating healthy and exercising can release happy hormones in the body.

Aggression And Irritability


Stress impacts your teen’s patience making them more irritable and aggressive. Being cooped inside the house for a long time also aggravates the stress, affecting their patience. Your usually mellow teen may suddenly become hostile towards you or their sibling for no reason. Although that is unhealthy, you need to address their emotions with understanding.

Your teen’s anger is also affected by the sudden loss of their usual routine and lack of control over their current situation. When they suddenly become enraged, let them calm down first them talk to them about it. You may also need to help them to channel their aggression towards other activities like exercising and journal writing.

The most important thing to remember when dealing with your teen’s emotional health problems is to keep an open mind and heart. They will need you more now than ever because there is so much happening around the world that they cannot fully understand and control. Be ready to listen and talk to your teens and help them be emotionally healthy while in quarantine.

Categories: Family Support

How To Support A Sexually Abused Victim

May 25, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

The 2019 Stop Abuse Event did not only talk about the realities of sexually abused victims but also provided tips to loved ones who care. Admit it or not, we don’t know how to approach these people. Do we walk on glass with everything we say or do we lend an ear and say nothing at all? With these in mind, here are some of the things that you should know, and a few tips you can apply when consoling them.

Listen To What They Have To Say


Each victim has their own story. There are times that they might feel a little awkward about what has happened to them. If they are ready to talk, however, then make sure to listen to their story. Let them express their fear, frustration, anger, and sadness in their struggles. At the same time, do not try to butt in when they’re in the middle of their story as they might only feel judged.

Show Empathy, Not Sympathy

Most sexually abused victims prefer receiving empathy as compared to sympathy. They want to feel loved and understood. Some of the phrases that you can utter are the following:

  • “You’re so courageous to be able to talk about this.”
  • “I believe in you.”
  • “You have done nothing wrong to deserve this.”
  • “It will never be your fault.”
  • “You are not alone.”
  • “I am here to listen and help in every way I know how.”
  • “This should not have happened to you.”

Avoid saying statements like “Don’t cry.” or “Cheer up.” Let them process their feelings and show your support by understanding what they’re going through.

Regularly Check Up On Them

Even if they experienced these sexual assaults a long time ago, you should still check them regularly. Although it’s in the past already, it does not mean that it’s entirely gone. Always ask how they are to remind them that there are still a lot of people who care for their wellbeing.

Know Your Resources


You’re a reliable and consistent supporter, but you must know how to manage these situations. To be able to validate their feelings, you must educate yourself using reliable resources on the internet. 

Categories: Family Support

Ways To Create An Emotionally Supportive Home For Your Kids Amidst The COVID-19 Outbreak

April 24, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery


It has been an incredibly challenging time for all of us as the pandemic continues to hit numerous countries around the world. It has affected many families, threatened job security, and overwhelmed health care systems. Many feel the stress and anxiety brought by the uncertainties of the pandemic. Parents now have a definitive role in maintaining a safe and supportive home for their children.

Children may deal with their emotions in different ways. With the schools closing, events getting postponed, or being separated from their friends, they are going to need support as they cope with the sudden changes in their lives. They may not directly express their feelings, but they are facing the same stress, and anxiety parents probably feel these days.

It’s important that in times like this, children feel comfortable sharing their emotions and understand that they are not alone. Here are some ways parents can create an emotionally supportive home for their children amidst the ongoing global crisis:

Inform Your Children Thoroughly

Keeping secrets from your children never helps. It is important to inform children by discussing what is COVID-19 pandemic while engaging them in a calm conversation. Answer their questions truthfully and explain the reasons why they are experiencing unexpected shifts.

Avoid using words that may scare them as they have the same worries just like you have. Creating a relaxed atmosphere can motivate them to tell you if ever they’re not feeling well. You can also comfort your kids by informing them about the generally mild health risks to children and young adults.

Melissa Merrick, Ph.D., and Robert Sege, MD, Ph.D., advised to, “Explain why physical distancing, staying at home, not playing outside with their friends, and canceling school are personal sacrifices that they (and we) make for the good of all of us.” You can also initiate to them a sense of responsibility in keeping everyone safe. Remind your kids that we all must think about the people around us, too and that staying at home can help limit the spread of the virus.


Let Your Children Process Their Feelings

Do not dismiss the emotions of your children. Their issues may feel small to you, but they can be a great deal for your children. While some children may quickly get by with the situation, some may have difficulty dealing with this unique situation. Be supportive of their emotions, help them cope by reminding them that being frustrated is normal. Support them and convey empathy to their problems.

Stick To An Organized Routine At Home

Children can feel the days are passing by if they’re productive throughout the day. You can encourage your family to create a new structured schedule for them to follow daily. Make timetables for their activities so that everyone can monitor them. For example, plan when they should be doing schoolwork, playing, connecting with their friends online, or do chores.

For children aged ten and above, it will be ideal for getting them involved in shaping their day. Ask them about the things they want to prioritize so they can have a sense of ownership of their schedule. Your children can find great relief when there is consistency, predictability, and time management.

Check Where They Are Getting The News

Misinformation on the internet is rampant. When your children take in such news without proper guidance, it may create more panic and induce stress. Check-in with what they hear about the pandemic, and debunk the wrong information they received.

It’s not adequate to give them accurate facts. You must discover what they already grasp and work from there. If you don’t, your children might mix up the misinformation with the truth. Keep a calm demeanor in discussing with your kids the importance of receiving reliable news.


Make Delightful Distractions

To help your kids balance their emotions, welcome new activities that everyone in the family can enjoy. Distractions give your kids relief from feeling stress and unsettled. Have a family game night, make arts and crafts projects, cook meals and exercise together, or do chores.

Encourage Communication From Other People

Communication plays a huge role in regulating children’s moods. Let them use social media to stay connected virtually. It can make them feel less alone during this crisis.

Children model their behavior from their parents. If they feel that you are panicking, they may also feel worried. They rely on you for a sense of balance and security. As much as you’re probably in a state of panic and shock, too, you must manage your anxiety and stress. Your children need you to be reliable, so stay healthy and remain open with your family’s emotional struggles.

Categories: Family Support

How To Help Your Teen Cope With Her Pregnancy

March 31, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

The 2017 Teenage Pregnancy Summit further promotes the society’s roles in helping teens cope with their pregnancies. More so, families—as the smallest unit of society—have a definitive role in assisting teenagers as they manage the changes in their lives. As much as the news of your teenage daughter’s pregnancy shattered your heart, it is best to move forward and support her in her trying times.



Teenage pregnancy can have a profound impact on your daughter’s life. As parents, you have to be strong for yourself and your child. You can help your daughter cope with her pregnancy by making her understand her options, health risks, and the possible difficulties ahead.

Provide Her With Constant Support

As much as it shocked you, your child is experiencing anxiety and fears as well. It is best if you ask her about her feelings, comfort her with your presence, and nourish her with love now more than ever. You can also give her tips regarding the changes in her body, such as morning sickness, and assist her in scheduling prenatal appointments. 

It’s also best to remember that forcing your opinions on your child regarding her pregnancy won’t do any good. It will be better to have an open and understanding communication with each other in discussing her and the baby’s future.



Discuss With Your Teen Her Options Regarding Her Pregnancy

A pregnant teen does have various options to consider, such as the following:

  • Keeping the baby. In case your daughter decides to keep the baby, you have to discuss with her the responsibilities she will now have. Be realistic and practical so that your teen can visualize the whole picture.
  • Placing the baby up for adoption. If your teen decides to give the baby up for adoption, discuss with her the types of services available. Come with her in consulting with professionals and talk about the emotional impact it entails.

During this time, it’s best not to be judgmental and let your teen make her own decisions. Your role as her parents is to guide, not to dictate.

Encourage Proper Prenatal Care

Teenage pregnancies are considered high risk as their body is just starting to grow and are not yet fully matured. Encourage your teen to inquire about prenatal care, get tested for sexually transmitted infections, eat healthily, and stay physically active.



Categories: Family Support

Teenage Pregnancy: Keeping The Baby

January 31, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

The issue of teenage pregnancy is something that people need to be serious of. Unfortunately, there are still many areas all over the world wherein sex education is not provided to the teenagers. Some countries are still conservation, which is why the topics about sex are considered taboo in an educational institution. The effect of this is that many young individuals fail to take into consideration the consequences when they engage in unprotected sex.



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Categories: Family Support

What It Is Like To Date A Drug Addict

January 24, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

Nowadays, there are already many changes in the dating world. The truth is that a lot of things have changed over the past few years. Because of these, it becomes more complicated for many people to get to know one another or to bring the relationship to the next level. One of the issues that usually come up in the dating cycle is realizing that you had a wrong first impression of the other person. A great example of this is meeting someone you like who, unfortunately, is a drug addict.


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Categories: Family Support

Teenage Pregnancy And Psychiatry

January 3, 2020 • Kelly Montgomery

One of the worst things that you may encounter in this life is to find out that your teenage daughter is pregnant. Once you discover about this, your heart will inevitably break. This is only normal, especially when you want nothing else but the best for your child. However, focusing on the problem will only make the recovery process more difficult on your part. As such, the right thing to do is to accept the situation and deal with it, as any mature individual would do. 


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Categories: Family Support

Help A Partner Get Over Substance Abuse

December 27, 2019 • Kelly Montgomery

Many kinds of challenges may come in every marriage. Some of these obstacles are just small, which is why they can be resolved almost instantaneously. On the other hand, some issues are too significant in that they require immediate attention as well as the constant effort from both spouses. One of these serious issues in a marriage is finding out that your spouse has been doing too much. Of course, you want to help him get over this negative situation in life. The question now is: How can you make it happen? 


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Categories: Family Support