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Category: Family Support

The Significance Of Strengthening Family Support For Emotional And Mental Wellness

March 14, 2019 • Kelly Montgomery

The family is the first pillar of support where we get help with our everyday struggle. They are the ones responsible for keeping our emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being intact. Each member of the unit is our source of reference; the first persons we turn to when we experience challenges in our lives. Since they are essential in our growth and development, it is a priority to strengthen family support.

“This idea of feeling connected becomes very reinforcing, to all of us, and it contributes to happiness, it contributes to mental health and it does contribute also to physical health,” says psychologist John Northman, PhD.

Source: flickr.com

The Usual Scenario Of Family Relationship

Every family experiences challenge and struggle with different types of relationships. Not everyone agrees on the same opinion, and not all members of the unit are responsible enough to acknowledge their mistakes. There are times when we encounter misunderstandings and conflict. Those are the usual things that happen inside the family. But what’s sad is when decisions brought about by our weaknesses become a reason not to view our family as someone vital for our recovery. That instead of opening up our emotional problems to them, we choose to be with friends and strangers. We assume that other individuals are more capable of protecting us, helping us, and loving us unconditionally. With that, we do not find ways to connect and reconnect with our family. The particular action limits the chance of the family in knowing significant changes in the unit because there’s no open and honest discussion about what challenges and issues we are going through.

The dilemma with society nowadays is that they no longer believe that a family is capable of helping each of its members. What is worse is that most of them feel that it is entirely the number one cause of detrimental ordeals. Since there are tons of issues that arise every day such as neglect, abuse, and abandonment, most people don’t see the significance of the family’s support anymore. They think that a person’s development is only attached to social connection and that his overall growth merely depends solely on the environment. But that is not true. Since every individual starts their lives with their families, they will remain the most significant contributors to an individual’s emotional, spiritual, behavioral, and mental health.

Source: flickr.com

Changing The Habit Of Getting Closer

Every family has the same goal. That is to become healthy emotionally and mentally and make sure that the members of the unit grow and develop as sell- sufficient individuals. The focus of strengthening family support is to allow everyone in the family to become responsible for taking care of themselves so they can serve others as well. Because when families stick with each other, it allows the community to develop too. The unit is far more significant than just a group of people living in a household because they are different individuals who care, love, understand, and support each other no matter what.

So instead of us not talking and sharing our problems with our family, we should acknowledge the importance of opening up things that confuse and bothers us. We have to exert an effort in spending time with them and knowing everything about them. It’s not only for the benefit of getting useful information that will strengthen the relationship, but for the advantage of gaining respect, knowledge, and self-worth too. What we learn from our family’s values and disciplinary actions helps us to grow in life. That is because there’s honesty, kindness, and self-confidence. Their support becomes the foundation of our maturity.

Robyn Fivush, PhD, emphasizes the importance of eating with your family. She wrote, “[T]here is a lot of evidence that eating a meal together has positive benefits for children. The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse finds that families that eat dinner together have children and adolescents that are less likely to engage in risky behaviors, including smoking, drugs and sex, and more likely to engage on prosocial behavior, including attending school and getting good grades.”

It’s important to reach out to your children, but you should also remember not to demand them to communicate with you. Arthur Bodin, PhD, tells parents, “You recognize they have a life of their own. You don’t try to micromanage them there.”

Source: media.defense.gov

Acknowledging The Family’s Worth And Influence

Family support is crucial especially in times when we don’t understand the things around us. We have to admit, we can’t survive alone in this world and that we need essential people to look out for us, give us hope, and become our strength. We wouldn’t be who we are without the support of our family. So instead of complaining and looking at our differences, we need to recognize the right sides of each other. Everyone will not agree on one thing, but that’s okay. It will teach us to have a better understanding of how each of us thinks and responds to what’s currently around us. Nothing can give us a complete emotional and mental safety other than our family.

Friends and special someone can have a choice to stick with us. But our family will never have second thoughts of doing so.

Categories: Family Support

A Quick Guide To Helping Troubled Teens

January 21, 2019 • Kelly Montgomery

Source: pixabay.com

 

A lot of things can get in between family members, which is why it is essential for everyone to learn the different ways on how to handle a situation. One of the possible problems that may arise in a parent-child relationship is a misunderstanding between the two parties. There is a high possibility or chance that the child may start to rebel against his mother and father the moment he starts to feel that no one is around to care for him. At the same time, it can also lead to some serious problems such as early marriage, dropping out of college or even teenage pregnancy or fatherhood.

 

In this article, our primary focus is discussing the proper methods on how to assist and help troubled kids. The first crucial thing that you need to understand is the fact that the way your child acts is affected by several circumstances. For this reason, it is significant on your part to determine the factors that could have given a bad influence over your teen. Below are some of the things that you need to keep in mind all the time:

 

Always Communicate Efficiently  

 

Remember that communication includes listening and talking. Make sure that you let your beloved child know that you are always there for him no matter what happens. Make him feel that he can open up to you anytime so that he will not have a hard time dealing with his issues. In this modern day, it can be difficult on the part of the teens to connect with their elders. As such, do not make it more difficult by becoming available whenever they want to talk. Most importantly, never show them that you are uninterested in what they have to say.

 

Use The Right Words

 

When it comes to conversing or communicating with your teen, be sure to choose the right or appropriate words. You have to be sensitive enough so that you cannot utter something that may offend him. Therefore, it is best if you would think twice before speaking. If you are not fully informed about the present situation or circumstances, the best thing to do is to keep silent. At the same time, you must also see to it that you will keep a friendly tone in all your communications to ensure that he will not feel threatened by you.

 

Sean Grover, LCSW, also reminds parents to look at themselves and their actions and take responsibility for the behavior parents are modeling. He said, “Too many parents don’t consider how their choices are actually producing their child’s negative behavior.”

Source: pixabay.com

 

Know His Friends

 

There are many ways on how you can get to know your son, one of which is meeting his friends. Doing so will allow you to somehow build a connection with your kid as well. “The objective is not to be your teen’s best friend, but to find common interests that you can discuss peacefully. Once you’re talking, your teen may feel more comfortable opening up to you about other topics, ” wrote Lawrence Robinson and Jeanne Segal, PhD.

Hence, make it a top priority to get to know all the people whom he gets to see every single day. Know the names of his classmates, schoolmates, and friends outside of the school campus. If possible, find a way to have a personal encounter with these individuals so that you can assess whether they are of good influence or not. Just avoid sounding condescending so that your teen will not hate you in return.

 

Keep Everything Private

 

The moment you discover that your teen has gotten into trouble, the next step that you have to perform is to comfort him. Do not embarrass him in public so that he will not feel rejected. Aside from this, it is crucial to make him realize that you are willing to forgive him no matter what happens. Avoid airing your family’s dirty laundry in public. Avoid the habit of talking about your son’s failures and mistakes in front of your friends. Remember that your words to others can harm your son in so many ways.

 

Never Give Up

 

It can be challenging and stressful to maintain a good relationship with a child or teen who does not want to get help. There will be several days when you may feel like giving up, especially when you notice that your efforts are going to waste. However, losing hope about your child’s welfare and future is only going to hurt you and the entire family. Thus, you have to keep going. Find strength from your husband or other children so that it will not be more difficult on your part to offer more patience and understanding to your beloved teen.

 

As Dona Mathews, PhD, said, “With a little effort, you can almost always find humour instead of aggravation, and share that with your child. Let them feel they have someone on their side who doesn’t take it all too seriously, but at the same time, sees how hard it is and loves them all the same.”

Source: pixabay.com

 

Seek Professional Help

 

As a parent, it is vital for you to learn how to assess the condition of your teen. Do you think that his attitude has become more erratic lately? Have you experienced a worrying encounter with him? Is it possible that he is suffering from a psychological issue or mental health problem? If you are not sure with the answers, it is ideal to seek professional help. All that must be done is to get in touch with a professional therapist or counselor who can be trusted. Book an appointment ahead of time to avoid inconvenience.

 

Follow the tips mentioned above and your problem with the troubled teen may be eliminated soon.

 

Categories: Family Support

Things You Wish You Did When You Were 15

November 8, 2018 • Kelly Montgomery

Source: pixabay.com

 

If you could be 15 once again, what would you do differently? Undoubtedly, there is no one alive on this planet who could say they got it all figured out when they were a teen. It’s just bittersweet to look back to the time when mistakes are fun. We didn’t care because we know it’s a part of adolescence. We are supposed to do stupid things and laugh about them. However, some of these deeds may have serious consequences that could affect our life ahead – adulthood.

 

Since you can never be 15 again, what are the things you wish you knew back then? For sure, there’s a thing or more that made you say to yourself, “I should have known!” Somehow, knowing all the things you know now is like going two decades back with a winning lottery combination. If only life was that simple or might we say kinder?

 

3 Things You Wish You Did When You Were 15:

 

Source: pixabay.com

 

Never Miss A Class

School may be uninteresting when you were a teen. However, it is the time when you are free to learn about the things that may or may not be a necessity in the future, the things that might interest you or not. Skipping a day in school makes you miss out on something that might be the day when you find out “who you are.” An ordinary day could make you realize what you want to be instead of being just the average employee. Learning the stars could make you dream of being an astronaut and be actually be one someday.

Be Nice And Make Friends

The bond that you make when you are in high school is unique in many ways. It is the time when you were the most vulnerable, and it’s like knowing everybody’s weaknesses. You cannot be friends with everyone, but you can be nice at least. Don’t judge your seatmate for the way he bites his nails because he probably wouldn’t a decade from now. Who knows? He might be your boss! It is a great feeling to walk past someone, and he recognizes you as the kind kid in high school.

Eat What Mom Cooked

Eat as much as you want! You will never look like any of the supermodels you see on TV because you are at the age when you haven’t fully developed physically, emotionally, and mentally, and it’s okay. No one is judgemental about your weight because everybody is judging everything they see anyway. The only judgment that matters is yours, so dig into all the great meals that mom serves on the table because it is the time when you would not have to be mindful of the calories in a plate. Someday, you wouldn’t be able to eat most of the food you can when you were 15.

 

Source: pixabay.com

 

Most of us, adults, had a moment when we say to ourselves, “I wish I knew. Maybe, my life could have been better, happier.” However, time is something we can never take back once gone. That part of our lives is already behind us. It may have influenced how we live now, but it is not too late for us. Instead of thinking about what you could have done differently back then, why not think of the things you could do differently today when it matters?

Categories: Family Support

How To Continue Living As A Bipolar Teen

September 28, 2018 • Marie Miguel

Source: flickr.com

One does not have to be a genius to know how devastating it is to be a teenager with bipolar disorder. According to John M. Grohol, Psy.D., “It is characterized by alternating moods of mania and depression, both of which usually last weeks or even months in most people who have the disorder.”

You cannot charge all your success to determination and hard work as the mania might have fueled your adrenaline. When you look sad, the entire family tends to panic and keep you in a close watch because the depression might push you to attempt suicide. Moreover, it is tough to know which side of the disorder will strike at any time.

Despite that, hoping that you’ll find normalcy as a bipolar teen does not make you crazy. It is possible, primarily once you stop hating the disorder and start doing the following.

Source: pxhere.com

  1. Avoid Stress At All Cost

People believe that your teenage years comprise the busiest period of your life. Everyone expects you to excel at school and sports. You ought to join different clubs to figure out your other talents. Aside from that, you need to socialize with adolescents in and out of school as a way to build connections for the future.

The problem with having to do all of these things is that your stress level has nowhere to go but up. High levels of stress can break even the most mentally stable person you know. When you acquire it and still need to deal with bipolar disorder, you are likely to experience one manic or depressive episode after another. “It’s important to take things slowly and avoid stressful situations,” says Steve Bressert, Ph.D. “If you are a student, most colleges and universities will offer good support and advice.” Hence, you should limit the stressful activities you participate in and try to be chill all the time.

  1. Watch Your Diet

It is recommended for a bipolar teen like yourself to pay attention to everything you eat. Consuming a few servings of greasy meals, cakes, and pastries, and junk foods daily can affect your health severely. Not only will you be a candidate for diabetes or cardiovascular diseases, but your mental disorder may also flare up due to it.

You see, the more you stuff yourself with fattening dishes, the lesser articles of clothing you can wear. The shirts won’t fit; the pants are impossible to button up. Going through a series of clothes to an ensemble that can encase your blossoming figure can undoubtedly be depressing, so you need to control your cravings to prevent the symptoms from getting in the way.

  1. Get Enough Sleep

“Sleep is critical for people with bipolar disorder,” says Margarita Tartakovsky, MS. On a regular basis, sleep deprivation causes your skin to break out and gives you dark bags under the eyes. If you happen to have bipolar disorder, the lack of rest at night will not only be terrible for your aesthetics but can also trigger your manic episodes.

Likewise, it will help if you avoid sleeping for more than eight hours every day. That is a sign of depression, and you are merely feeding the disorder by letting your eyes stay shut for too long.

It is best to stick with a bedtime schedule so that you won’t accidentally activate the illness with irregular sleeping habits.

Source: pixabay.com

To Sum Things Up

Bipolar disorder is an illness that affects your mood and way of thinking. There is no cure for this condition; you can only try to cope with it. Because of that, you have to change some aspects of your life that can worsen the disease.

Feel free to start with the three things mentioned above, and then keep on looking for more facets to improve as you mature.

 

 

 

Categories: Family Support

Benefits Of Social Media In Preventing Teenage Pregnancy

November 22, 2017 • Kelly Montgomery

 

Source: pregnancyweeks.org

 

Social media has provided enormous help to people. Back then, we get information from the newspapers, encyclopedia, or the TV, which sometimes were limited. We need to get more, but it’s all we had. Since the birth of the internet, knowledge about almost everything had been available for everyone who has access to the internet.

But social media has its pros and cons, and it is for sure one of those that have extreme advantages and disadvantages. It provides awareness about important matters like prevention and treatment of certain medical conditions, but at the same time, it exposes irrelevant insights about sensitive issues such as sex.

Sex can be perplexed when not explained thoroughly, and with all the information on social media, parents cannot always be with their children to point out which are appropriate and which are not. Some studies show that ever since the birth of social media, teenage pregnancy has declined.

 

Source: sayanythingblog.com

 

Benefits Of Social Media In Preventing Teenage Pregnancy

Provides Awareness

Social media is an exceptional tool to gather information about almost everything. When teens browse their newsfeeds, there are good ads and good reads about the consequences of their actions, like engaging in premarital sex. It exposes them to what might happen when people at a very young age get pregnant. It helps them decide what they want. One might have probably said, “I wish I can have that, too,” or maybe, “I am never going to be like that!” According to Lara Jakobsons, PhD, teens now use social media for education, “It is beneficial for parents to understand what social media is being used for by their teen and how. Being educated in how they use it will help parents understand the risks involved.”

 

Educates The Youth

It educates not just the youth but all the people about the diseases acquired through unprotected sex. It gives precautions to avoid anything that can harm our overall wellness. We learn about prevention and treatment of every medical condition that only doctors would know back then. “As a healthcare provider, I frequently find it helpful if patients have done some additional reading about their specific medical concerns and find the internet can frequently be helpful tool,” Dr. Michelle Matthews, MD said.

 

Opens Opportunities

Social media is a tool to showcase talents and skills. It provides space to boost a person’s self-esteem when he is too shy to do it in the outside world. It gives the youth the opportunity to make new friends, see places, learn new things, and other matters that will indulge their interests and imagination.

 

Serves As Diversion

It makes the youth busy with all the exciting things they can do on social media. Now, they can chat with their friends real-time through the internet. They don’t need to sneak out to meet and end up doing crazy stuff just because they want to make their time out worthwhile. “Social media sites allow teens to accomplish online many of the tasks that are important to them offline: staying connected with friends and family, making new friends, sharing pictures, and exchanging ideas.”, Gwenn Schurgin O’Keeffe and co-author, wrote.

 

Provides Options

It shows the vastness of this world and what the younger generation can achieve through learning about the lives of successful people. The positive things they see on social media inspire them to be the best that they can be. It gives them hope that their life is more than just the place they are now. It decreases the cases of teenage pregnancy because it provides the youth with a glimpse of the other choices they can make with their lives.

 

Source: pexels.com

 

Everything has advantages and disadvantages. Some may say social media is not suitable for the teens, but at the end of the day, it is up to the person using it if he’s going to put it to good use or not, and as parents, it is your responsibility to make sure that your child understands that.

 

 

Categories: Family Support

Curiosity Kills: Teenage Drug Addiction

September 8, 2017 • Kelly Montgomery

At first, it was just curiosity, and after some time, it became an addiction. Some say that it’s okay to make mistakes, especially when you’re young. They say it’s the point of being young. What Raychelle Cassada Lohmann Ph.D. said was true enough: “Sometimes the desire to try drugs is a satiated need to satisfy curiosity.” She adds, “These youth often convince themselves that one time won’t hurt anything, or better yet, they tell themselves, “everybody else is doing it so why can’t I?” They feed themselves lies to justify their unhealthy behavior.” But sometimes, the youth should learn from people who say otherwise, particularly their parents, about grave mistakes that are not worth doing.

Source: files.wordpress.com

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Categories: Family Support

Drunk Father, Drunk Son

July 13, 2017 • Kelly Montgomery

Source: cdn.psychologytoday.com

“Like father like son,” so it shouldn’t be a surprise if a child takes after his father. Mine did, or almost if I didn’t do something. I had to give up on him for my son’s sake, but I have to say my husband made it easy for me. He wasn’t the best dad or partner either, so leaving him was not really difficult. Yes, it was painful, but in the end, it was worth it.

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Categories: Family Support

Truancy Can Cause Failure In Life

May 26, 2017 • Kelly Montgomery

[Reasons And Outcomes]

Source: divorcefirmlongisland.com

 

Are you having problems with your child? Is he skipping class and failing? These are common concerns of parents of an adolescent, but what is it with this age that makes some children do things that are somewhat hard to understand? You keep on coming up with answers until you have none left but “He’s a teenager, that’s why!”

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Categories: Family Support

Video Games Caused My Son To Be Violent

March 21, 2017 • Kelly Montgomery

[Games You Should Never Allow Your Kids To Play]

Soource: pixabay.com

Carl and I have a 9-year-old son, Gavin, whose behavior disturbs us. He is our only child, and I don’t know where he got his violent behavior. His dad is very timid, and so am I. Lately, he’s been showing alarming attitudes, and we’re not sure what to do. His teacher even called to let me know he punched some kid just for borrowing his pen. His teacher said he didn’t want to give it away, but the other boy took it anyway, so he punched him in the face!

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Categories: Family Support